


Reasons to Stay

by hawkeyeandthewintersoldier



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Clint Barton's Apartment Building, Deaf Clint Barton, M/M, Minor Character(s), Minor Kate Bishop/America Chavez, Mutual Pining, Past Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:08:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26817859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hawkeyeandthewintersoldier/pseuds/hawkeyeandthewintersoldier
Summary: Clint doesn't think he could ever be Steve's soulmate.Steve doesn't think Clint could ever be his.But maybe they have a bigger chance than they think they have.
Relationships: Clint Barton/Steve Rogers
Comments: 2
Kudos: 47





	Reasons to Stay

**Author's Note:**

> This mixes the MCU and Matt Fraction's Hawkeye run and isn't fully canon compliant for either one. Takes place somewhere after The Winter Soldier, in terms of the MCU. 
> 
> This is my first fic for this fandom and the first thing I finished in a long time, so I hope people like it! This is unbeta'd so my apologies for any mistakes. English also isn't my first language so sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes. 
> 
> The title is from Ira Wolf's Pictures on the Wall. 
> 
> Please enjoy :)

Steve officially lives in the tower, according to Natasha at least, but he doesn’t spend a lot of time there. If he’s not off chasing Bucky with Sam, he can often be found on Clint’s couch. Now that SHIELD has fallen and he’s the owner of an apartment building in BedStuy, Clint spends most of his day being a landlord. He likes his residents, they are good people and now the tracksuit mafia is gone, the building is a good place to live. It keeps him busy, so that’s good, too. 

He doesn’t know why Steve spends so much time here, though. But it’s not like he’s going to complain. Steve is fun to be around. Earnest, sweet when he wants to be, and a funny little shit, too. Not to mention good-looking, though Clint tries to avoid going down that rabbit hole. He’s dated a coworker before and that didn’t end up entirely well. He and Natasha are okay now, the best of friends but it had been awkward for a while. And the Avengers are a much smaller team than the entirety of SHIELD had been. He and Nat had been able to avoid each other, he and Steve won’t be. Unless one of them leaves the team. It’s a ridiculous line of thought anyway. Steve will never want him that way, to begin with. He is pretty sure Steve is holding out for his soulmate. Clint knows the universe will never consider him as good enough for Steve. He wonders who is. He wonders if it is Sam or Bucky or someone they’ve yet to meet. 

For now, Clint has decided he will just keep these feelings to himself and enjoy what he can get. Maybe one day he will meet his own soulmate. He touches his soulmark on his hip, a small star still devoid of color, and his own mark next to it, a small purple arrow. He hopes his soulmate will be half as good as Steve. Until then, he has Steve’s friendship and that’s precious to him. 

Steve loves going to Clint’s apartment. It’s safe, it feels like home and as long as Clint is willing to put up with him, he will cherish it. He and Sam just came back from chasing another lead on Bucky. It was nothing, which seems to be all they find these days. Sam is off to visit his family in Harlem and Steve is one his way to BedStuy. He thinks that maybe Bucky doesn’t want to be found yet and he is surprisingly okay with that. He just wishes he had a sign that Bucky is okay. Then, if Bucky wants him to, he will back off. 

He doesn’t mind that, he thinks, as long as his friend really is okay and he can stay here in Clint’s apartment. He can be happy here. Without a doubt. He is afraid to ask for more than that. He is happy with Clint’s friendship. Even though he wants more. But Clint probably has a wonderful soulmate waiting on him somewhere. He has no need for Steve. That´s okay, Steve thinks, he has dealt with heartbreaking things before. He touches his soulmate’s mark, a small colorless arrow, on his wrist underneath his watch. His own is a small blue star. Touching the mark is soothing. Steve likes that, likes touching it. He takes a breath and then he carefully knocks on Clint’s door. 

Clint opens it with a smile and it makes Steve’s heart beat faster. God, he loves this man with his entire being. 

“Feel like joining the rooftop barbeque?” Clint asks and Steve nods, “Come on, then.” 

Everyone in the building is there. Simone and her kids. Aimee and her roommate. Grills, Deke, and Tito. Kate had shown up too with her girlfriend America and Lucky, Clint’s dog but also kind of Kate’s. They’ve all brought things to eat and Grills is manning the grill, serving up things for everybody. It’s wonderful and it makes Steve almost forget about how much it had sucked to lose track of Bucky again. 

Steve spends the night talking to different people, but he never really loses sight of Clint. Until Kate corners him, that is. 

“You love him, don’t you?” She asks. 

“I uh, uh, I, yes,” Steve stammers, “But I… Clint… he doesn’t. He doesn’t want me like that. He is probably just waiting for his soulmate.” 

“I think you have more of a chance than you think you do,” Kate says. 

He thinks she is wrong but he doesn’t want to argue with her. Especially not about this. It breaks his heart too much. So he changes the subject. 

“So you and America?” He asks. 

It works wonderfully. She tells Steve about how they met and how they discovered they carried each other’s soulmarks. He is happy for them. They seem like a wonderful pair.    
  


Everyone has gone back to their own apartments and Steve has joined Clint in his. To say goodbye, Steve said, but Clint doesn’t want him to leave. Wants to bask more in his warmth. Wants to be near him as much as he possibly can without making things weird. 

“You don’t have to go back,” Clint says quickly, “Uhhh if you want, you can stay.” 

For a brief moment, he thinks he messed up, that he has shown too much. But then Steve smiles, completely lights up, and nods. It fills Clint with joy to see him this happy and it fills him with excitement that he put that smile there. 

“I can take the couch,” Steve says. 

“No, no, you should take the bed,” Clint insists, "not like you haven't slept in it before."

Steve crosses his arms, “I can’t kick you out of your own bed,” He says. 

Clint crosses his own arms, too, “I can’t let you sleep on that couch. It’s terrible,” He says, “So I’m taking it.” 

Steve stares at him, then shakes his head, “I can’t let you do that. Like you said, it’s terrible. Maybe I should just go back to the tower,” He is clearly trying to sound like it’s no big deal, but Clint can see his shoulders slump a little. 

“If you don’t mind… I have another option,” Clint says and he can feel his cheeks heat up, “We can share the bed. It’s quite big, so…” He scratches the back of his head. 

“Alright,” Steve is smiling again. 

Sharing a bed with Steve, just as friends and knowing that’s all they will ever be, is going to be torture but seeing him smile like that makes it worth it.    
  


Sharing a bed with Clint, knowing it will likely be the only time he gets to do so, is torture. But the idea of leaving, going back to the tower, and being alone, makes Steve feel ice-cold inside. And Clint offered. So he decides to take what he can get. 

They both undress, Steve averts his gaze. He doesn’t think it’s polite to look, Clint probably won’t want him to. Part of him wonders, though, what Clint looks like underneath his clothes. If he is as beautiful as he is everywhere else. If he has a soulmark and where. Steve thinks he must have, must have someone waiting for him out there. Clint deserves to be loved like that. Deserves everything. 

Steve folds his clothes and places them next to the bed. Then he takes off his watch, places it on top of them as Clint turns off the lights and they get under the covers. They talk some until they both fall asleep. 

When Steve wakes up, he has his arm wrapped around Clint. He untangles it and sighs in relief when he realizes Clint is still asleep. At least he won’t have to explain his feelings to Clint, doesn’t have to lose Clint. The thought of that hurts too much. 

He decides to get up and make them breakfast. It’s the least he can do. He’s familiar with Clint’s kitchen anyway, with how often he has been here lately. 

Clint wakes up to an empty bed. He sighs sadly, then chastises himself. It’s not like he and Steve are anything more than friends. This is all he gets to have and he has no right to ask for more. 

He puts in his hearing aids and walks to his kitchen. He smiles when he spots Steve. Steve holds out a mug to him and Clint takes it eagerly. 

“Awwh coffee,” He says. 

Which is when he spots it. There on Steve’s wrist is his mark. 

“You have my mark,” He says in disbelief, putting down his mug. 

“I do?” Steve asks softly, eyes full of wonderment. 

Clint reaches out and nods, touches Steve’s wrist gently. 

“That’s mine,” He says, he pulls down his boxers slightly so he can show Steve the marks on his hips. 

“Can I touch?” Steve asks. 

Clint nods and smiles when Steve places a careful hand on his hip. 

“You are mine. My soulmate,” He says, “I’ve been… I’ve loved you for a while now but I didn’t dare hope.” 

“I didn’t dare to hope either but I’m so happy it’s you,” Clint says, “I love you.” 

“Can I kiss you?” Steve asks. 

Clint presses their lips together. Everything inside him lights up. Their soulmarks fill up with color. They really belong together and it’s more than he thought he would ever get to have. His soulmate, his Steve. 

“I’ve waited for this for such a long time,” Steve says after they let go of their kiss, “I’m so happy it’s you. I love you so much,” He places a hand on Clint’s cheek, strokes his face gently with his thumb, and he is smiling widely. 

Clint looks so perfect, so good for him. Steve is grateful that the universe placed him on his path. Grateful that he gets to have this wonderful man. His soulmate, his Clint.


End file.
